Fairytale Thoughts: Handless Maiden

When I read the fairytale of the Handless Maiden (also known as the Maiden without hands), I was swept up in the tale resilience. The Maiden, knowing nothing good would come from staying in the place where she was harmed, embarked on a journey without her hands.

Hands symbolized connection; connection to people, and the physical world around her. When you think about the numerous activities humans perform with their hands, they can range from waving to fixing a complicated machine. Hands are the central bridge in communication and interaction. For those in the deaf community, hands are an integral part of life from speaking through sign language to emphasizing feelings. So I posit that the handless Maiden, in some ways, lost all forms of communicating with others after her ordeal. Knowing herself and relying on the compassion and grace of others (and herself) allowed her the strength to go on a journey to reconnect.

Many individuals in the Disability community may seem to lack means of connection at first glance. Initially, they may not communicate in a way we understand. Just as the Maiden found the cottage that proclaimed, "anyone can live here free", we can offer those with differences the freedom to connect in their own way. Individuals and society as a whole can create a place for all to live free.

Earlier in the story, the King fashions the Maiden new hands out of silver. While the King's kind gesture offers some relief in the larger society. The silver hands weighed heavy on her arms and did not offer any form of connection. She could not feel with those silver hands.

I think of the assistive technology we have access to today and how technology has become our primary form of communication. A software that gives words to the wordless is lovely; however, it does not replace sitting with an individual and communicating through sounds or signs and body language. Sometimes adding technology breaks down one or two barriers while it creates one or two more. This is why new hands had to grow back. A new way of communication had to develop from within the Maiden.

When the Maiden is given time to "live free," her hands grow back, and she starts a new journey. While the limbs will never work perfectly or come back miraculously for those with disabilities or traumatic injuries, the fairytale shows that a new way to connect will develop over time. After this transition, a new way of being and a new journey begins.

The Handless Maiden tale gives us a good template on how to support anyone going through a transition. Giving them time to process and meeting them where they are is a great way to model the cabin sign "where everyone can live free." Be patient and allow your friends to develop a new way of connecting with you.